It's Mets For Me: Off-Beat, Tangentially Relevant Mets Ruminations

Off Base Since 2005! Mets commentary from the counter-intuitive to the unintuitive and all the intuitives in between. ** "Through the use of humor and gross inaccuracy...a certain truth can be gained." Rob Perri ** (pester me at:itsmetsforme@gmail.com or follow me @itsmetsforme on twitter)

Friday, August 22, 2008

Pissing on the Parade

There is no such thing as a bad sweep of the Atlanta Br*ves, like they say there's no bad pizza. The Mets basically were gifted yesterday's finale courtesy of a bad ump call and a plot of slippery grass. So it hasn't made me as euphoric as it could, though I'd like a serving of personal revenge against the Asstros starting tonight. In the face of this season-long disaster, we Mets fans have nurtured the dream that the team will gel at the right time, come out of the NL East, and go improbably bonkers in the playoffs. But folks, we don't have a closer, a pen, or a consistent offense and this is by all reports a snake-bitten team. If you look past the recent feast of second division sad sacks, gaze deeply in the mirror, you know that the only thing going for the Mets this year with any consistency has been the poor quality of the NL East competition .

Perhaps it is, as Mark Herrmann of Newsday says, beginning to look a lot like the Mets can take this thing, this thing being the NL East crown. But if you a) have seen the Mets bullpen in action, b) occasionally watch highlights from around the league or c) remember the beat downs suffered at the hands of the Angels or Astros, you can't be too optimistic about the Mets October odds. And, if you're the skittish type, DO NOT look at the Mets' remaining schedule--Houston, Philadelphia, Florida, Milwaukee, and the Cubbies take up 22 of the 32 remaining games. OOhhh Shit. Despite what has gone before, the Mets won't win the NL East unless they deserve it, you can be sure of that.

[RANTING EDIT: Dawn Perry is at it again, calling the Mets remaining schedule easier than the Phils but generally using numbers to tell us nothing about anything. Obviously, since I just said it is a difficult remaining schedule, he is wrong wrong wrong. Does he actually have his robot look at the quality of teams the Mets are playing and/or how they've fared against them? Plug this into your Texas Instruments 4000 you dope: Houston, Philadelphia, Florida, Milwaukee, and the Cubbies. Perhaps Dayn was driven to distraction by all the Reyes' currently on the Mets roster. He is not worth my trouble, or links to other times I have slagged him (try Dayn's a Dope as a label). I will never ever never be convinced he knows jack shit about baseball. On his better days, he brings us a "perspective" informed by the worst of stats tunnel vision. Of course he is brought to you by Faux Network, destroying the MLB one game at a time]

To make it into the land of Dane Cook and Joe Buck, the Mets will have to overcome more than the schedule. The Mets have severe pitching problems that have been hidden by the team's recent spate of games against hopeless clubs. If you're keeping score: John Maine is hurting. Countrytime is gone. And Dirty is doubtful. That is some heavy shit folks. I got no answers.

In addition, now that the Mets brass finally discovered young players, the Mets have to do some juggling. J-Man may earn his stripes integrating a slew of potentially productive players into the outfield and second base slots, because with the return of several regulars--none of them functioning relievers mind you--the Mets have a so-called "good problem." The Mets have comically postponed Luis Castillo's welcome home party for a while now, (they've done everything but hide his cleats) league rules may force them to give Luis a place at the pre-game buffet. Luckily, none of these guys in the mix, the newbies or the oldbies, have the status to really put up a stink. Outside of Ryan Church, who I hope will be able to find right field, none of them could feel they have rights to certain minutes at certain positions. Still, with all the Murphs, Tatis' and the like have done for this club, they need to get regular playing time.

But if the Mets are still strapping on their cleats come October, you have to ask yourself, IF the offense continues to get it done, and IF the starters continue their reconnaissance, how the hell will this club hold a lead? Aaron Heilman is a nice guy and a decent pitcher, but mainly he is a goat. That is probably never going to change.

***

Best answer to this question wins a prize (my affection): For the love of Pete's Dragon, how could Old Duque just now be getting around to having bunion surgery? Was he assigned a role in OPERATION: Luis Castillo Diversion? Did he think they were saying "Funion" "Funion" all this time?


***
Ah baseball. How long will you get away with this? I know. Forever.

***

While I'm always happy to have my marginal to irrelevant status confirmed, there has to be room for rancorous debate among Mets bloggers and their sharper critics. I respect and am even grateful for the accomplishments of some of the more established blogaratti, but I also love me some critical approaches of those who aren't afraid to toss a few interweb hand grenades once in a while. In fact, I'd be upset if there was no such debate, it's a healthy thing. But keep it civil fellas, or you'll have no energy left to blog this year's collapse!

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8 Comments:

  • At 12:45 PM, Anonymous n8genius said…

    That was refreshing/depressing....in all honesty I cant argue with your analysis, it rings of truth...the schedule is not in their favor and the need for a solid relief corps is essential esp.in the postseason...none of this can be denied...having stated this, Baseball is not a sport where the obvious plays itself out...the baseball fortunes are capricious and inexplicable things...we have been observing fuzzy logic and unpredictable occurences thruout the history of this great game..ie. how could the Yankess outscore the Bucs 55-27 and lose the series? cmon...this defies logic or precedent...however I agree that the Mets are in for a cold glass of water in the face in the weeks ahead...twould appear that things are exaggerated and that they could fall quickly back to earth in pieces, although I pray not!

     
  • At 5:49 PM, Blogger Jaap said…

    this team has the markings of success - overcoming adversity over and over and over again.

    this is a team that beats odds and obstacles.

    this is a team, more than any other mets team, that I want to root for.

    and fuck - if they make the world series, it's the reason to return to america. I'm getting giddy.

     
  • At 7:09 PM, Blogger Itsmetsforme said…

    N8genius, I was just trying to temper your enthusiasm so our poor little hearts don't get stomped on again. Of course I hope none of it's true. Jerry Manuel might know something we don't. They may just win when no one thought they could.

    Now as for my colleague Jaap, I don't know what got into him. We may need to stage an intervention.

     
  • At 10:21 AM, Blogger katherine said…

    Wow - IMFM, you are so grouchy! I am trying to keep an even keel, too, and not get overly excited, but shouldn't we at least allow ourselves to enjoy it while it lasts?

    I thought I would try to seriously answer your question about El Duque and his bunion. But it does seem inexplicable. I read up on the surgery and even the most extensive procedures allow for athletes to return to running in 3 - 4 months. So even if you have to add to that, considering a pitcher might need extra rehab, he certainly could have done this back at the end of the 2007, when it first started bothering him. He'd be pitching now.

    And I laughed out loud at "ad hominem, humina, humina."

     
  • At 7:26 PM, Blogger Itsmetsforme said…

    see Katherine, I suffered the sweep in Houston a few weeks back, and I knew a night like tonight was coming. The mets have lost 4 of 5 from the Asstros this season, making me crabby.

    Maybe the procedure for bunions is to remove the entire toe now? Maybe Old Duque didn't want them to saw that puppy off and count the rings.

     
  • At 9:51 PM, Anonymous Keyser said…

    We miss you at the meets. WE wont be at Barney's this week, you can check out the site to see where we are.

    To be fair, the Mets beat the Angels 2 of 3 this year, so its hard to call that a beatdown.

    It seems that all of the commenters at hotfoot are fans of you after all.

    Personally, I don't care if bloggers accept a luxury box invite to a Mets games. Last time I checked, the bloggers aren't pretending to be objective journalists. They are Mets fans first who post their thoughts on a blog. Wouldnt a normal Mets fan jump at the chance to sit in a luxury box for a Mets game?

    Its not like the Mets approached these bloggers 3 months ago and said "You can have a day in a luxury suite only if we like your posts the next 3 months." Im sure they didnt say "You can come back for another game only if we like you"

    I understand the concern with Metsblog being an official partner of SNY and by extension the Mets. However, I dont see any evidence so far that his criticism has been tapered. Besides, I don't go to Metsblog to have Matt Cerrone echo whatever my particular gripe with the Mets is that day. I go to see the latest news, rumors, and roundup of opinions and stories, and in that sense, he is doing the same great job he has always done.

     
  • At 10:08 PM, Anonymous Dan said…

    I think the huge gaping problem with your post, is that there is such a thing as bad pizza. I understand many of those in the met blogging business live in on or around the ny metro area, where for the most part even bad pizza is still pretty good. but once one wonders to the far reaches of new york state...well, lets say you'll find the pizza equivalent of imfm: the deuce.

     
  • At 11:59 PM, Blogger Itsmetsforme said…

    Comments galore!

    Hey Keysie--Sorry I've been away. I've been going out of town and every time it looks like i can go, there's either satellite tv issues at the beanary or i just can't. There's a certain large writing project i need to attend to as fall approaches, otherwise I'll be writing this blog for a living and asking you for money. And no one, not even Dan, wants that.

    As for the dust up, well, some bloggers take what they do very seriously, and for them it is probably worth considering their independence. For others this isn't a concern. I am a subjective hack so I don't have a dog in that fight.

    Truth is, I'm too goddamn handsome to be on air in a luxury box and not get paid. SNY couldn't afford me AND Hernandez at the same time. Even if I got into the company of the SNY gang, I'm sure there'd be misunderstandings and regrettable fisticuffs with Giants LB Antonio Pierce involved there somewhere, and I'm certain Dom from "Metstasized.com" would not have my back.

    Dan, well I think he hits it on the head. This was a pretty dumb post right from the beginning, full of errors and vicious calumny. As soon as i typed that bit about pizza I knew I was in the wrong. People do say that about pizza i guess. But there is plenty of bad pizza, as the continued existence of the Los Angeles metropolitan region ensures on a daily basis. And, although I personally saw a (one) beat down, a pasting of the Johan at the hands of the Angels who looked invincible to me, solipsism is not a reliable guide to public journal keeping.

    But as soon as I attacked Dayn Perry for no reason at all, I felt much better.

    But in the end, it was a waste of time to bitch about the Mets. They're gonna do to us what they do, and there's nothing a little inaccurate blogging is going to do about that.

    So I take the whole post back. Except the part about Perry. He's a pinhead.

    This all gets me thinking, if Dan would add a "y" to his name, I'd be willing to let him take over the Deuce! Imagine the possibilities.

     

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This blog is meant completely and entirely in jest, unless you count the angst, and is not meant to offend anyone, unless you are a Br*ves fan. It's not affiliated with Sterling, the Mets, common sense, good taste, or anything really.