It's Mets For Me: Off-Beat, Tangentially Relevant Mets Ruminations

Off Base Since 2005! Mets commentary from the counter-intuitive to the unintuitive and all the intuitives in between. ** "Through the use of humor and gross inaccuracy...a certain truth can be gained." Rob Perri ** (pester me at:itsmetsforme@gmail.com or follow me @itsmetsforme on twitter)

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Hits Don't Come Easley, But Mets Beat Rockies Endyway











Reyes passes the torch of team superstar sparkplug to Damion Easley

Winning "pretty" is fun. But there is just no way to come up with an original pun with which to adorn this post. If this game were to be graphed by a drunken monkey with a crayon and some rudimentary english skills, it might look like this:

---------------------------------------------------@!?*#!----------YAY!

It's always an encouraging sign when your team isn't hitting for shit, but still finds a way to win when its little guys come through. Reyes, Beltran, and Delgado went an astounding 0 fer 14. Some cRockies soon-to-be-devastated-by-injury pitcher or another inducing nothing but grounders that I think I could get to if I had cleats on.

Enter Sandman. Exit tie.

Enter Badass.

Willie's magic 8 ball tells him to send up D-Ease , who waits til 0 and 2 before calmly knocking that mutha out of the park. 1-1. Or Uno Uno for you Spanish speakers. Then Endy surprises everyone on the planet by executing a walk-off slap drag bunt and winning the game, leaving the only remaining question, which of these astounding plays was most shocking? Well, that and the other burning question: can't Kaz Matsui stop faking injuries long enough so he can get one little at-bat against the Mets and I can see him in someone else's sleeveless uniform? I am told the cRockies have instituted a new "buy sleeves for your uniform with your own money if you want them" policy to try to save money for the Todd Helton and Mike Hampton contracts.

There are times when I suspect that Willie knows as much as I do about managing Major League Baseball. And there are times when I suspect Shawn Green, Error Machine, is one Hamfisted Hebrew in the outfield. But there are also times when I go to bed happy anyway, er, Endyway. This is one of those nights.

***
It's never, never too early to start your All Star ballot box stuffing.

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2 Comments:

  • At 6:45 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Try not to use the word "ham"fisted when referring to a Jew.....its an unkosher animal is strictly forbidden and the reference might appear demeaning to all Jews

     
  • At 11:51 AM, Blogger Itsmetsforme said…

    Ok, no one around here wants to offend or demean (non-Br*ve) Jews, but it would be helpful if you could have also anonymously suggested another word that starts with "h", so I don't offend the comedy or aliteration afficianados out there.

    Hammer Handed Hebrew?
    Horrible-fielding Hebrew?
    Hella-bad-fielding Hebrew?

    help me out here...

     

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This blog is meant completely and entirely in jest, unless you count the angst, and is not meant to offend anyone, unless you are a Br*ves fan. It's not affiliated with Sterling, the Mets, common sense, good taste, or anything really.