It's Mets For Me: Off-Beat, Tangentially Relevant Mets Ruminations

Off Base Since 2005! Mets commentary from the counter-intuitive to the unintuitive and all the intuitives in between. ** "Through the use of humor and gross inaccuracy...a certain truth can be gained." Rob Perri ** (pester me at:itsmetsforme@gmail.com or follow me @itsmetsforme on twitter)

Monday, October 10, 2005

HOT STOVE...OWW SHOOBIE DOOBIE!

Here's my contribution to the Jr. GM'ing season regarding the names being bandied about. It looks to me like agents are already telling their boys to feign interest in the metsies!!

With this partial list, I want to be the first to argue against every single available free agent or trade possibility, so that later i won't have to rewrite an entry I'm working on, entitled "I told you so!" Basically, I would sit on my freakin hands, boys and girls:

Lyle Overbay=ryhmes with "Overpay"=The second coming (technically the third coming, but there is no such expression) of Jeremy Canthitz. PASS

Benji? Molina=does anyone else besides me know he's 31 years old? How does a guy named after a talking dog block the plate? Also, he's raking in the playoffs ala Beltromar, so already being blown way out of proportion by NY media hype machine-maybe the Mets Brass' single biggest enemy. PASS

Konerka=never heard of him--how many great seasons has he had again? PASS

Jojima=stop it. um, broken shin, plays for a team named "softbank", and CAN"T SPEAK ENGLISH TO PITCHING STAFF (Ishii probly not staying, folks)...he's japanese for budah's (sorry for the mispelling) sake! Mets and Japanese players don't mix PASS WITH EXTREME CAUTION

Soriano=dont know what to say about this guy, other than he's pushing probably 40. It wont go away. MAYBE no PASS, no MAYBE. ARGH!

Ramon Hernandez, San Diego=didn't impress me in series with mets, but also is he worth the kind of cash a catcher feeding frenzy will result in? Doubt it. PASS

Furcal=i still hate all br*ves, including toothless (agent) Tom(ahawk chop). Furcal is annoying and streaky and why would he want to play second? Why don't they just sign Julio (undead) Franco and freakin' Andruuw Jwones and call the team the Br*ves? Stop bringing this up. Please. PASS he's an ASS.

Delgado=you really think the Mets would go after this guy, to help their buddies the Marlins cut bait after what he and his weanie agent said? You just aren't paying enough attention. Say ten pledge of allegiences or whatever Delshmado refused to do. PASS he's an ASS.

Every and All Devil Rays. I know Lame-ar got canned, but still hesitate to go after these players...after all, there's a reason why the Rays SUCK, and i'll give you a hint, it has to do with their players. PASS.

Manny=$60 million headcase, can bounce ball off of head when fielding fly balls; probably on decline. Would Lil' Theo try to screw us for prospects as well as our sh*tty pitching and extra outfielders? It says here he would. MAYBE

Here's hoping Omar doesn't let the metsies get taken for suckers again.

6 Comments:

  • At 8:55 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I agree with everything you are saying. We need a power hitter, with a 280 or more average that does not strike out much, preferable a RF. A closer and either a catcher or a second baseman. I am sold on Benson, to go all the way we need a stud power pitcher. Use Jacobs and Diaz at first, trade Cameron and also get a reserve outfielder with some pop that can play CF. Get rid of the dead wood, eg. Graves, Offerman,Williams, etc.

     
  • At 10:09 AM, Blogger Wild Duck of CT said…

    Mr. KIA,
    First of all, Wilpon has to get himself another dancing bear or two to help him shill for the new network. Skills are nice, but not necessary. Need a big name or two. You got anyone in mind?

     
  • At 5:42 PM, Blogger Itsmetsforme said…

    that is such a poetic comment, i need to sober up to answer it. what is a dancing bear? I think we should acquire Vlad Guerrro.

     
  • At 5:42 PM, Blogger Wild Duck of CT said…

    A dancing bear is a "name" who is signed with the express purpose of selling tickets. That is of prime performance. Performance on the field is secondary. For example, if Omar had traded for Sammy Sosa, or if we get Jim Thome. Resigning and overpaying for Mike Piazza would fit the bill as well.

     
  • At 5:45 PM, Blogger Itsmetsforme said…

    I like it!

    But what if the bear don't dance, like Alomar or...Carlos...

     
  • At 9:35 AM, Anonymous Andrew said…

    Oh, we'll make it dance.

    We'll make it dance.

     

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